How do Normal people see us

"It must be Lhatkins because I am never over opinionated :rds2:"

But you are very much a "Dude"

I guess i'm pretty much the same as said above, no deliberate intention of reacting in any way other than how I normaly would. But the fact that I try means that i'm probably acting different.

I'm sure the guy in the pub was probably drunk and probably woke up the following MOrning thinking "I was a bit of a twat last night".

 

As others have said, for most it's the not knowing how to react in the company or presence of a disabled person. Quite simply, because IME/IMO, for the vast majority of the "normal" population, they have never come into (regular) contact with that many disabled people, if ever at all - with the exception of Rds it seems .

There are at least 2 misconceptions, which have already been eluded to in the above replies. One, is that because that person has "a disability", they're brains somehow function differently to that of the "normal" person - perhaps they may think more slowly for example. Secondly, they are in a certain degree of continual suffering or pain. Both are not true. It does depend upon the exact condition, but pitty is often not required.

As for blindness and visual impairment, the most common misunderstanding that I have come across is that of visual cues and body language. Somebody across a crowded room may be trying to make eye contact for example, but they may get offended when an acknowledgement or recognition is not communicated back - the reason for this may be because the visually impaired person did not "see" the other person's visual cue but also maybe because the visually impaired person's eyes may not appear to the other person to be focused directly at them when in fact they were all along. I've (helpfully) been told in the past that I don't always look people directly straight on when talking to them, i.e. sometimes it appears as if I'm looking over their shoulder, but to me I'm actually looking them straight in the face/eyes when necessary - the potential misunderstandings which arise from this type of situation are many and varied but you get the idea.

A common question (more times that I can remember ), that people like myself who are visually impared yet don't have zero-vision but don't ware glasses is "why don't you ware glasses?" when they see us looking closely at something. The simple answer is simply that they don't help! It's difficult to explain, and even harder for the normal sighted person to comprehend, but yes, there are scenarios where glasses don't actually give significant improvement/correction. :MILD:

I often find that there is great alarm and plenty of fussing which goes on whenever I start a new job, and people get very concerned over how closely I sit to view a VDU screen (about 6 inches away). Quite often, say after about a month or so down the line, people soon get use to the idea, and have often been told that they forget I even have poor sight (apart from when they see me sitting with nose almost pressed against the screen or a book).

So yes, I can't offer any better advice than that already given. Forget about treating a person with a diability any different. The worse thing is making a great of that person and behave as if you're tyring to walk on egg shells, and if unsure just ask directly.

 

Nope, I thought that was really funny!

Now I couldn't have put that better myself, I think it makes a minor problem even worse, for the people its supposed to help.

 

Almost right Dom, she lost her sight 11 years old due to a brain tumor.

 

Hi Harry,

I think you outlined some very good points there. The glasses thing is something that does come up a lot. I think most people are under the impression that glasses are the cure for all poor sight, but if your problem is in the optic nerve, or there is disruption in the signal getting to the brain you can see why glasses would have no possitive effect at all.

Yes the work issue, to focus I have to set about 5 to 10 cm's away from my monitor, it doesn't matter how big the monitor is it makes no odds, I just can't see it clearly enough if I'm any further away, but on a regular bases is someone new walks past my desk I get "It'll damage your eyes looking that close", I'm always tempted to say "well they can't get much worse" but instead opt fo the polite response detailing why I need to do it.

Its a funny thing, I worked in the parts department for a local garage for my first job for about 5 - 6 years, and I got less hassle and problems with that, than I do working in a local council office, what is that about, ok I'd get the odd customer with a problem, but usually the mechanics would come to my rescue.

And lastly your point on IQ, now I'm not the brightest bulb in the box that I know, but I'm not 5 either, so why if you have a disability your suddenly labeled as retarded? I had a big problem with that at my first (main stream school) they thought that because I couldn't see, I couldn't think either.

auric, your right, I would label myself as eccentric, I do have strong opinions, though I'm trying to keep them under control these days, but if I meet you in the pub, your welcome to a beer!

 

Indeed. One incident I remember quite clearly, and that still makes me laugh...

I was down the Cavern in Exeter one Saturday night with Simon and Ed, both of whom are totally blind, well, Ed can see shadow, but Simon is totally blind and has 2 glass eyes. Anyway, Simon asked me to guide him into the toilet, so I did. When he'd done, he found his way across to where the door was, only just as he was getting to where I was stood waiting, a fully sighted person came charging in straight into him. "Look where you're going", "not really possible", "why's that?", "I'm blind", "No you aren't, you're not carrying a white stick", "look, do you want me to take my eyes out and prove it?" The look on said moron's face was one of shocked horror, especially when Si went to do just as promised

Some other good points though, especially the body language/eye contact thing. It's especially bad when someone says that they saw you at such and such a place, and you totally ignored them, but that usually only happens once if you tell them why. Of course, if some bird in a club is trying the eye contact thing, then it's going to be totally lost on us, which is a very bad thing!

 

I've seen Si do that (but not in the Cavern) and it is indeed totally grim - even for someone used to seeing that kind of thing at school. It's the empty sockets that really freak you out - very very gross indeed. Funny though - almost as funny as the time when someone peed him off and he stuck one of his eyes in their glass of water when they went to the loo...

Actually - I *AM* retarted; nystagmus is a vicious circle of the eyes not scanning properly due to cateracts or whatever, so the brain's automatic scanning doesn't develop properly - hence brain "damage". Interestingly enough, there's one thing I've found that helps, but it's very dangerous and very illegal...

The glasses thing REALLY REALLY REALLY pees me off though - it's very hard not to rip strips off someone when they ask you that. One day I'll blow and go "If they f***ing helped I'd be f***ing wearing them ya dappy twonk!!!" but that said, I'd feel very guilty if I did that...

Trying to describe what you can see to a normal person is the hardest though - for me, if you removed my lenses it'd be like looking through a smashed windscreen - but without the lines between the glass fragments - ie, thousands of small points of focus but no overall clear image. But not blurred either - kind of like a VGA image in true colour next to the same image at the same size in XGA - just lower resolution. When the nystagmus acts up it's like very bad camcorder shake (so resolution goes right down). When I occasionally use that naughty method to remove the problem, it's frightening how much better I can see when my eyes aren't rolling around all over the place.

And I agree - PC DOES build barriers - too much mollycoddling of a disabled person does them no favours at all.

 

You should try to get it on prescription!

 

He he he - I don't think so... Mind you, it would be great fun if I could, though my concentration span might go down and I'd be dancing around to the sound of all the phones at work...

 

hmm, eyes

I was born partialy sighted, first op at 3 months and another 14 ops between then and being 16.
My eyes are now starting to play up again, but i rekon ive had around 18years of good sight. Considering i was more or less blind at birth i consider myself very lucky to have had those years of good sight.
I dont consider myself to be disabled at all. It is just one of those things in life, i doubt any of us are physicaly perfect!

Strange thing, my eyes have never worked in harmony with each other, my right eye is strongest and as such i tend to be viewing with that eye and not the left. This all means that apparently i dont see a proper 3D world like most people, but what i never had i cant miss did mean i was crap at ball games tho, just couldnt get the perspective right of the ball heading towards me - plenty of knocks to the head thri that one

 

That probably explains why I hate football and can't play tennis, but can play pool... I too have out of kilter eyes but my strong one is the left one; 3D is overated if you ask me - you can do all that stuff via perspective anyway...

I was born totally blind so like you, pleased to be able to see something now I hope your eyes stabilise though as losing sight sucks...

 

Im sure they will Dom, im not worried about it.
At 33 im hitting the age where things will deteriorate, thats just life i guess