The thing is we have hit new year, the tele is full of messages, the brain is full of messages, the papers are full of messages, every where is full of messages. The messgaes are 'new start' and 'give up..'
What is important is to make a lifestyle change decision. Paul you need to be commited to this. By that I mean you have to feel it in your heart, you have to know this is the time to change. If you are not committed you will fail.
What is important to you right now is to understand that if you fail, this is not the end. This is not an excuse. If you fail, get right back up the next day and carry on giving up!
Do this for yourself. You feel like **** today? Good for you! You feel something! When I did dope (And I was not a heavy user by any means) the only real emotion I felt was dumb ass laughing. Once dope is not a rule in your life it may well be enjoyed again as 'Question' has said. But right now you need to stop for months, if not a year before you can feel confident to have just 'a joint' when it comes up.
Messages are difficult, messages on forums will not really help in the end, what is important is that you want to move on with your life. Dope may not kill, but it sure as hell does not move you forwards.