greg
Its a G thing
Tenson - I think she's probably testing your relationship and your comittment to her. The arguments are probably fuelled by her sense of insecurity and she's looking to see you show your true colours - she's probably half expecting you to tell her to f*ck off, but she's hoping you won't. Mixed with the ups and downs of the menstrual cycle you are left feeling completely confused because you just want a simple and positive relationship.
Trouble is if you are too reasonable she'll come to think of you as a push over and if your not flexible enough the problem will just continue - ie. you're pretty f*cked either way at least until she starts to grow in self-confidence. IME this is typical of many women I have known, especially late teens early twenties and at times it can be frustrating and rather childish IMO, but that's talking from the perspective of a man, the world may seem a whole lot different from the other gender. Personally I think a lot of this type of behaviour is looking to see whether you have "broad emotional shoulders". If you are relationship material she expects you'll take the hassle without flinching because you're strong. Similarly don't look to understand what the problem is with a view to "solving" it - this is a typical male response which make sense to us, but I think what she wants is for you to show patience and to listen to her expressing how she feels. I guess this is a cathartic process where a "solution" is not really the objective.
THB if you love her and want to stay with her then you need to find a way of responding to her needs whilst not losing sight of your own - but dont expect any concessions you feel you make will add up as "relationship credit". You start on zero, any bad things you do puts you in debit and good stuff you do moves you back up towards zero. Very occasionally you might have a credit of 1
If you dont see you staying together then you're better off calling it a day sooner rather than later so you dont waste any of your collective precious time - afterall you could both be looking for a more ideal partner instead.
I met my now wife in early '89 when I was just 18 and she was one day off 17. We've had plenty of ups and downs, but I think we're meant for each other. We married in '95, we've got four children and we still have our ups and downs - ie. she's still a woman I'm still a man. I dont claim to understand her - I'm lead to believe that's a 40 year long course with a 400,000 word thesis at the end.
Trouble is if you are too reasonable she'll come to think of you as a push over and if your not flexible enough the problem will just continue - ie. you're pretty f*cked either way at least until she starts to grow in self-confidence. IME this is typical of many women I have known, especially late teens early twenties and at times it can be frustrating and rather childish IMO, but that's talking from the perspective of a man, the world may seem a whole lot different from the other gender. Personally I think a lot of this type of behaviour is looking to see whether you have "broad emotional shoulders". If you are relationship material she expects you'll take the hassle without flinching because you're strong. Similarly don't look to understand what the problem is with a view to "solving" it - this is a typical male response which make sense to us, but I think what she wants is for you to show patience and to listen to her expressing how she feels. I guess this is a cathartic process where a "solution" is not really the objective.
THB if you love her and want to stay with her then you need to find a way of responding to her needs whilst not losing sight of your own - but dont expect any concessions you feel you make will add up as "relationship credit". You start on zero, any bad things you do puts you in debit and good stuff you do moves you back up towards zero. Very occasionally you might have a credit of 1

If you dont see you staying together then you're better off calling it a day sooner rather than later so you dont waste any of your collective precious time - afterall you could both be looking for a more ideal partner instead.
I met my now wife in early '89 when I was just 18 and she was one day off 17. We've had plenty of ups and downs, but I think we're meant for each other. We married in '95, we've got four children and we still have our ups and downs - ie. she's still a woman I'm still a man. I dont claim to understand her - I'm lead to believe that's a 40 year long course with a 400,000 word thesis at the end.
